Playing Offense

I was meditating on the life of David this evening, and couldn't help but to notice that when he was "running" from Saul, he wasn't attacking the Philistines and other enemies of Israel.  But then, in a fascinating turn of events, he appears to go into enemy territory to hide (and ally himself with the Philistines) which allows him to stop "running" and go on the offense against a host of different enemies of Israel.

I have noticed that when I am under attack by the enemy, I  am not fighting on the offensive.  Instead, I am living a defensive lifestyle.  Bold faith becomes difficult. My life becomes about "protecting myself" instead of advancing the Kingdom of God.  What is worse, is when I go on defense, the attacks always seem to increase in frequency and number and power.  Now I understand why Jesus didn't answer his critics or defend himself, but simply continued in his ministry.  (No, I'm not Jesus, but He lives in me, and His Spirit leads if I'm willing to follow).  He was certain about His direction, and refused to "play" defense.  He continued in His offensive strike against the Kingdom of Darkness despite the criticisms, being misunderstood, and even when he offended people.  

Sometimes I think we invite criticism when we are too sensitive to how people react to us or our ministry.  Sensitivity often invites more critiques, which is perceived as weakness.  Humility, on the other hand, is much different.  Humility is about dependence on God...which this past year God has been teaching me that my life needs much more of.  Sensitivity seems to be related to the fear of man, whereas humility is related to the fear of God.  

I know I will not please everyone.  Heck, I am learning I probably won't please anyone.  There is ONE that I must please.  That lifestyle, like David's, is one that refuses to live on the defensive, but rather focuses on moving ahead in faith.  

Birthing Revival

During our trip to the VOA in Lancaster, I heard several specific messages that the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart.  Let me share one that I believe has massive implications for my church, our town and our region.

On the first morning of the conference, Jennifer and I attended a crowded prayer meeting in a lower conference room.  A delightful lady led it with passion and joy.  About midway through the meeting she blurted out, "The time of transition must end."  It struck me like a lightning bolt.  I stored it up in my heart and went on to the rest of the conference.

Later that same day, Heidi Baker (missionary from Mozambique) spoke at the conference.  She shared a story about how she was about to catch a plane but had like an hour until departure.  In the same town, was a friend she knew was about to have a baby, so she stopped in to see her.  While there, the doctor told them that her friend was only 1 cm dilated, and that it would be a "long time" before this baby was born.  (I'm going to omit some of the details here).  Heidi recognized that the time was short and that she had made a commitment to her friend to help her birth...so she boldly declared "Now is the Time"  The baby was born 10 minutes later!  Heidi tied this story in to her recognition that the church is "in transition"...pregnant with revival, but not delivering.  "It is time to stop the transition.  It is time to call the birthing forth.  It is time to declare on earth what is in heaven."

I began to think about my own church (and the churches of Madison and UNO) and how we have been "transitioning" for over 5 years now toward a move of the Holy Spirit.  Walking softly, trying not to insult or be misunderstood by our members.  Not wanting to offend, but maintain unity.  The problem is, that people left anyway, because they weren't unified around the Presence of God.  We weren't unified around the earnest desire to see revival (the Presence of God manifesting in our region).  Our unity was simply the desire to "keep our membership intact."

That transition must end.  We (I) must lay aside our fear of man. I choose to do so today.  I choose revival no matter the cost.  I choose Holy Spirit and all He wants to do in our midst.  No more delay.  We declare the birthing to come forth...that which is in heaven to come to earth.  Now.  Today.  No more delay.

Addendum:  As I prayed over these thoughts, God reminded me of a prophetic word given our Madison/Geneva pastors prayer meeting when we were praying for revival.  "The coming revival will not be in a single church, but will arise in the entire region, so no one can call it theirs."  I dwelt on that thought and realized that when God releases His Spirit upon our region, we will have "little fires" all across our region in our churches.  But it will only be when we come together that we will have a firestorm that will be unstoppable, unquenchable and irresistible.  I envision Sunday services in our own churches to feed our flocks, and daily services where God is moving, in a large space where we can all come together and bring the power of God to bear upon our community.  Where no one church bears the responsibility to do all the worship leadership, all of the ministry, but where we all share the load of touching our region, and perhaps our nation and the world. 

Wind in the Sails?

Yesterday, I was listening to Bill Johnson and a sermon he was giving at a conference in Fort Worth, Texas.  He made a pretty earth shattering statement that "Beware of any doctrine of the sovereignty of God that leaves you being merely a spectator." 

Now, I subscribe (at least intellectually) to the belief that Dutch Sheets has laid out that "God does little in the earth except by or through the prayers of His people."  In other words, God very often holds his hand until someone prays.  He chooses to limit much of His conduct upon the earth to working through His people, the Church. 

Bill Johnson went on to say that authority and power are evidenced in a picture of wind and sails.  Essentially, power is what is being manifested when we raise our sails to the wind.  God sends the wind, and we merely raise our sails to join Him in what He is doing.  But authority, according to Bill, is when we release the wind. 

It is easy to be passive as a believer.  It seems so much safer to be passive than to take risks and to stick my neck out and risk looking stupid or worse.  Yet, when Jesus gave His disciples "authority over unclean spirits, to heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers and preach the Kingdom of God" He was delegating authority to them (read "us") to take steps of faith in Him. So we not only look to see what God is doing and join Him in that process (which I believe is obedience) but we also can step out boldly in faith and move into the unseen realms, trusting God is there because we have the mind of Christ. 

Die Flesh Die!

I started a three day fast on Tuesday, not really a hard thing, considering it only involves the abstention of food after 3pm and  until 7am, and the fasting from television and computer distractions during that time as well.  But my flesh certainly rebelled, and rebelled hard against it.  By 6:30pm on the drive to church, I found myself irritable, by the trip home I was not just irritable but edgy, short in my responses to my wife and trying to come to grips with how to pray. 

Later that evening, Jennifer was cooking a meal for her employer (which she had to take to work with her the next day) and the air was filled the smell of italian food.  Now my stomach was in overdrive, having skipped dinner for "more time with God" I found myself complaining and unhappy.  So, I went to bed without telling anyone.  Jennifer came to bed an hour later and I was still grumpy.  When she asked if I wanted to pray, I mumbled out a "you pray, I'll agree with you."  (translation:  I don't want to!)  My flesh was not going to give in without a major fight.  The reason we had decided to do this three day fast was so that we could pray for our church and for decisions related to vision for the church as well as our own personal direction. 

Finally, after an hour of sleeplessness, grumbling to God and trying to "give it to Him" I rolled over and apologized to Jennifer.  Then we prayed.  It wasn't earth-shattering prayer, but it was a victory. My prayer now is "Die Flesh, Die!"  I don't like it when my flesh runs my life!

The Throne of God

Over the past week, I have had a series of Kairos moments that have led me to recognize that I need to understand and receive the "affirmation" of my Heavenly Father.  I have come to realize I do not operate as a person who sees himself as a person who is completely loved and accepted by my Father.  My critical spirit has led me to operate out of my wounding instead of my new identity in Christ.  So my disicpleship group prayed that I would powerfully experience this "affirmation" of Abba Father.

Last night, I had a dream that moved me in a powerful way.  I only recall the place, a man was speaking and preaching the Word of God, and I had walked into the room below where he was speaking. I found myself in a room that had a large domed ceiling. Inside this massive domed room, I encountered the Presence of God. This was a  place of Divine Encounter.  I was awed and humbled by the Presence, but do not recall my response other than my eyes were filled with tears of awe and joy. 

Even as I am typing this, I revisit that experience in my dream, and my eyes well up in tears.  It felt as if the Lord God, Father encountered me in my dreams last night.  His holy and awesome love surrounded me.  I honestly can say I felt His affirming love last night AND still feel and am experiencing His affirmation.

Dreams are places to make your mistakes!

Last night I had a couple of dreams that really exposed my heart.  In one of them, I was with a group of pastors eating a meal and a policewoman came up to our table and asked if any of us would be willing to conduct a wedding ceremony for the daughter of a congressman and her girlfriend.  I answered, 'My doctrine won't permit me to do so." 


When I awoke, I was ashamed of my cowardly answer!  I could actually feel the "fear of man" in my bones as I awakened.  As I prayed about it and the way it made me feel, I began to get downloads from God on the purpose of the dream and the way He would use it to train me.

Firstly, God made it clear to me that the place to make mistakes is in my dreams.  It is often in our dreams that our hearts are revealed, our deepest fears are manifested, and the heart of God is communicated to a mind that might be resisting Him. 

Second, God gave me a download, a revelation if you would, of what I should say or how I should respond to the very difficult question of "will you do my wedding ceremony?"  I have had so many requests over my ministry, and have never had a "standard" for how to say yes or no to them.  I have considered many approaches, all based upon externals like "church membership," "how long one has been divorced," "how long have they been engaged," to "are you sleeping together'" and a host of other potentially ambiguous and non-essentials.  I have even polled other pastors as to their policies for conducting weddings, and have found the standards as far ranging as humanly possible.  I have enacted policies for non-members that require a substantial fee compared to members, as well as requiring that the couples meet with me 4 to 6 times before the wedding.  But those have not helped, nor have they been able to change the hearts of those who had come to me. 

What I believe God showed me was to ask a simple but penetrating question.  "How would my conducting your nuptials advance the Kingdom of God and promote His Glory?"  The bottom line is that I would not conduct weddings unless they do both.  While that might appear hard and callous, it belies a solid truth behind the standard that I believe God wants for His Church and His people.  It really ought to be the standard for all of our life and conduct. 

Set Apart by John Mulinde

I am reading Pastor Mulinde's book and am beginning to see the hooks that the activities, hobbies, diversions and duties have in me. He describes their "cry for attention" as being what drowns out the call of God to draw near to Him, and inasmuch as we respond to their voice instead of God's voice, we institutionalize an idol in our hearts. These patterns of behavior and their network of activity draw us away from having a heart solely for God. No, they aren't "sinful" but are still sin, because they compete with God's sole possession of our hearts.

About 10 years ago, Pastor Mulinde says God had him list the diversions, the objects of his heart's affections, and he says he was shocked to find so many. God led him to a deep and lasting repentance which has resulted in a radical change in the way God used him.

As I reflect and pray about this, I recognize the awful truth that is here. Last year, when we fasted and prayed for 21 days, I saw the competing activities set aside as I made a conscious choice to give God my heart. This radical shift lasted for probably 2 months after the fast ended, and then I began to compromise on what I would spend time on. Before long, I found myself as deeply immersed in diversions as I was before.

What to do? I have agreed to begin a fast on September 18th which includes a fast from media (which comprises the bulk of my diversions and competition to giving God my time and attention) -- but the hard part remains...how to make it last. Stay tuned!